If you want different results do different things
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Why do we find it so hard to make changes? Why do we find it so hard to do what we need to do to create the life we want to create? What is really stopping us?
One of the major parts to this is the rules that society have given us that trap us into doing the same thing as the generations before us. Society is made up of all of the different cultural references around us, our parents, the media, our teachers, our friends. These forces teach us and influence us to live life in a particular way. |
I first found out about self-development and setting goals when I was 21 years old. I've had very mixed results with goals, but I have always kept setting them and working towards them. An interesting exercise I recently did was to go back through all of the different goals I have set over the decades and to see whether I had achieved them or not. A lot of the goals I set over the years are the opposite of what I actually want now!
hen I first started this process of setting goals, I wanted two children, a four bedroom house and a fancy car parked on the driveway. That was my definition of success and that is what I wanted to achieve. I don't think I ever truly took time to decide whether or not it was what I wanted. This is the definition of success that society portrays for us through the media, television shows and our families. Have you ever taken time to define what extraordinary or success actually means to you?
I never did. It wasn't until my thirties that I truly started to think about what I actually wanted in life, not what people told me success was.
The Standard Life plan which we have become to believe leads to success is:
This is the Standard Life plan that everyone seems to follow without actually considering what they want to do with their life. Some people wake up in their 30s and think is this what I really want? Some people wake up in their 40s and think is this really what I want? We call this a midlife crisis. Some people wake up in their 50s and think is this really what I want?
Some people have to wait all the way to retirement to face this. To actually consider whether the job they had is what they wanted and the life they're building is what they actually wanted. This standard societal plan traps us from ever thinking about what we truly want because we are taught that this is what success and happiness actually looks like.
Is a good solid career in an office what for 40 years? Or is there another option that might lead to more happiness for you?
hen I first started this process of setting goals, I wanted two children, a four bedroom house and a fancy car parked on the driveway. That was my definition of success and that is what I wanted to achieve. I don't think I ever truly took time to decide whether or not it was what I wanted. This is the definition of success that society portrays for us through the media, television shows and our families. Have you ever taken time to define what extraordinary or success actually means to you?
I never did. It wasn't until my thirties that I truly started to think about what I actually wanted in life, not what people told me success was.
The Standard Life plan which we have become to believe leads to success is:
- Go to school and work hard to get good grades.
- Go to university and work hard to get good grades.
- Secure a good graduate job so that you can start earning money.
- Buy your first property.
- Find someone to date.
- Get a pet.
- Upgrade to a bigger house.
- Get married.
- Have kids.
- Work in the same career or industry for the next 50 years.
- Retire.
- Die.
This is the Standard Life plan that everyone seems to follow without actually considering what they want to do with their life. Some people wake up in their 30s and think is this what I really want? Some people wake up in their 40s and think is this really what I want? We call this a midlife crisis. Some people wake up in their 50s and think is this really what I want?
Some people have to wait all the way to retirement to face this. To actually consider whether the job they had is what they wanted and the life they're building is what they actually wanted. This standard societal plan traps us from ever thinking about what we truly want because we are taught that this is what success and happiness actually looks like.
Is a good solid career in an office what for 40 years? Or is there another option that might lead to more happiness for you?
The expectations of society weigh heavily upon us.
Our parents want us to get a good education, get a good job and buy a big house because that leads to us having a happy life and them being seen as good parents! Society has a general life plan for us when we are born. It is the general life plan that parents have bought into leading to happiness for their kids.
They expect you to:
This is the standard life plan that we all get judged against. At one stage it was what I thought I wanted; not because I chose it but because it was what I was taught success was.
It's hard to stand out in society because you get judged for it. You get judged against this standard life plan. How are you doing compared to other people your age? How are you doing compared to average ages in your sector? How big is your hose compared to your friends?
After years of living in the same two bedroom apartment in Basingstoke (which we LOVED). I remember one comment that really struck me. A family member visited our home and asked "when are you going to buy a proper home?"
I remember thinking "what is improper about our two bedroom apartment in Basingstoke?" There was actually nothing wrong with where we lived, but this particular family member had decided that it would be better or time for us to upgrade to an actual house rather than an apartment.
They were trying to help us get towards what they thought would lead to happiness for us, or what made them look like a better parent to their friends so they could brag about our success. The interesting thing is that the exact opposite is what we did and what led to true happiness and freedom for us. I don't think people take the time to truly consider what makes you happy. They just project their version or society's version of happiness onto you and try to force you to do what they think is "right".
Everyone is trying to help you given the best of their experience. Don't get me wrong, mostly people have good intentions, they want you to be happier or they want to look better themselves. Everyone is trying to support you in making the best of your life. They are making decisions about what is best for you and then trying to help you get to it. However, very few people actually take the time to ask the question "What do you want for your life?" Before dolling out the advice!
Before offering advice, people should really take the time to ask questions like; what does success look like to you? What are you trying to achieve here? What is your end goal? If they truly understood where you're going, then their advice would be 100 times better.
The problem occurs because people decide that the Standard Life plan and way of living is what you're trying to achieve, and then they offer advice based on that. They know what leads to happiness; a bigger house, a promotion or a fancier car. The problem is that most of the time this advice takes you in the opposite direction, a bigger hose puts you in more debt and traps you, getting promoted in a career that is un-fulling helps you to feel unfulfilled faster and a faster car? Well that just gets you more debt, more status to maintain and maybe a slightly comfier ass!
I have caught myself doing it. I regularly assumed that people want to achieve financial independence or want to grow their successful business or want to live a certain type of life, and I jump in with advice before actually taking the time to consider what they're trying to achieve.
The challenge is that if you actually ask someone what they're trying to achieve, very few people can answer that question. That is actually the most important part of any coaching or life interaction is helping that person understand what they're actually trying to achieve and what the life of their dreams looks like. If you can help a person decide where they want to go and what life they want to lead away from societies expectations, you can help them to create a truly incredible and extraordinary life.
f you just assume that they want to go to university and get a better job, then you will force them down a route that might not be the best for them. Have you ever taken time to truly consider what you want in life? To think about the environment you want to live in? The business you or career you want to build? The body and health you want to create?
Most people never consider this. Most people will NEVER take the time to write this down come up with a plan and make progress towards it. Most people don't even consider what they want; they are just happy to accept the life plan that is handed to them by the media, school teachers, parents and Instagram influencers.
Who are the biggest influences in your life? Let's take a moment to consider where society's rules and advice comes from.
They expect you to:
- Go to school and get good grades
- Excel at sport and extracurricular activities
- Go to university and get good results
- Get a good graduate job
- Move out of home and BUY your own place
- Get a partner
- Get promoted - that always leads to more happiness
- Get a bigger house
- Get a Pet - so you can prove you won't kills the kids you have next
- Have kids
- Get promoted more - success equals climbing the corporate ladder
- Work for 50 years
- Retire
- Die
This is the standard life plan that we all get judged against. At one stage it was what I thought I wanted; not because I chose it but because it was what I was taught success was.
It's hard to stand out in society because you get judged for it. You get judged against this standard life plan. How are you doing compared to other people your age? How are you doing compared to average ages in your sector? How big is your hose compared to your friends?
After years of living in the same two bedroom apartment in Basingstoke (which we LOVED). I remember one comment that really struck me. A family member visited our home and asked "when are you going to buy a proper home?"
I remember thinking "what is improper about our two bedroom apartment in Basingstoke?" There was actually nothing wrong with where we lived, but this particular family member had decided that it would be better or time for us to upgrade to an actual house rather than an apartment.
They were trying to help us get towards what they thought would lead to happiness for us, or what made them look like a better parent to their friends so they could brag about our success. The interesting thing is that the exact opposite is what we did and what led to true happiness and freedom for us. I don't think people take the time to truly consider what makes you happy. They just project their version or society's version of happiness onto you and try to force you to do what they think is "right".
Everyone is trying to help you given the best of their experience. Don't get me wrong, mostly people have good intentions, they want you to be happier or they want to look better themselves. Everyone is trying to support you in making the best of your life. They are making decisions about what is best for you and then trying to help you get to it. However, very few people actually take the time to ask the question "What do you want for your life?" Before dolling out the advice!
Before offering advice, people should really take the time to ask questions like; what does success look like to you? What are you trying to achieve here? What is your end goal? If they truly understood where you're going, then their advice would be 100 times better.
The problem occurs because people decide that the Standard Life plan and way of living is what you're trying to achieve, and then they offer advice based on that. They know what leads to happiness; a bigger house, a promotion or a fancier car. The problem is that most of the time this advice takes you in the opposite direction, a bigger hose puts you in more debt and traps you, getting promoted in a career that is un-fulling helps you to feel unfulfilled faster and a faster car? Well that just gets you more debt, more status to maintain and maybe a slightly comfier ass!
I have caught myself doing it. I regularly assumed that people want to achieve financial independence or want to grow their successful business or want to live a certain type of life, and I jump in with advice before actually taking the time to consider what they're trying to achieve.
The challenge is that if you actually ask someone what they're trying to achieve, very few people can answer that question. That is actually the most important part of any coaching or life interaction is helping that person understand what they're actually trying to achieve and what the life of their dreams looks like. If you can help a person decide where they want to go and what life they want to lead away from societies expectations, you can help them to create a truly incredible and extraordinary life.
f you just assume that they want to go to university and get a better job, then you will force them down a route that might not be the best for them. Have you ever taken time to truly consider what you want in life? To think about the environment you want to live in? The business you or career you want to build? The body and health you want to create?
Most people never consider this. Most people will NEVER take the time to write this down come up with a plan and make progress towards it. Most people don't even consider what they want; they are just happy to accept the life plan that is handed to them by the media, school teachers, parents and Instagram influencers.
Who are the biggest influences in your life? Let's take a moment to consider where society's rules and advice comes from.
Your community
One of the biggest influences in your life is the people that you hang out with. Who are the biggest influences on your life? Who are the five people closest to you? What advice are they trying to give you? How are they leading their lives? Do you have to fight against them to go where you want to go to or are they supporting you to achieve your goals? Have you ever talked to them about your goals?
You gravitate towards the people that surround you. If they are thriving and happy and motivated they will pull you in that direction. If they are struggling and arguing and wasting their time they will drag you in that direction. It is HUGELY difficult to break the gravitational pull of the people that surround you.
One of the biggest influences in your life is the people that you hang out with. Who are the biggest influences on your life? Who are the five people closest to you? What advice are they trying to give you? How are they leading their lives? Do you have to fight against them to go where you want to go to or are they supporting you to achieve your goals? Have you ever talked to them about your goals?
You gravitate towards the people that surround you. If they are thriving and happy and motivated they will pull you in that direction. If they are struggling and arguing and wasting their time they will drag you in that direction. It is HUGELY difficult to break the gravitational pull of the people that surround you.
Your Media diet
The second source of societal pressure comes from the media and the content you consume. What do you read on a regular basis? What do you watch on a regular basis? What do you listen to on a regular basis? How are they influencing your thinking and what are they defining as successful for you. Have you taken what they say to be the truth without thinking about it?
A few years ago Katie and I were looking for a new series to watch on television. We like to watch a show sometimes at the end of a hard night to unwind, especially if we are tired and worked hard. There is something joyous about a good show hugging on the couch together. We couldn't find anything inspiring to watch.
So we decided to re-watch a series we had LOVED watching when it came out. The series is called the Sopranos
The second source of societal pressure comes from the media and the content you consume. What do you read on a regular basis? What do you watch on a regular basis? What do you listen to on a regular basis? How are they influencing your thinking and what are they defining as successful for you. Have you taken what they say to be the truth without thinking about it?
A few years ago Katie and I were looking for a new series to watch on television. We like to watch a show sometimes at the end of a hard night to unwind, especially if we are tired and worked hard. There is something joyous about a good show hugging on the couch together. We couldn't find anything inspiring to watch.
So we decided to re-watch a series we had LOVED watching when it came out. The series is called the Sopranos
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The basic story is about a New Jersey mafia boss, Tony Soprano, and his family problems. Interacting with his mafia family, his actual family, his wife Carmela and his mum.
We got hooked and started to watch two or three episodes a night. It was an addiction! After a week we had finished Season 1 and where onto Season 2. There are 6 seasons in total! We didn't notice this straight away but Katie and I started to have more arguments. We got angrier at each other. After one particular argument we looked at each other and asked "are we during into Tony and Carmela?" |
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You become the people you surround yourself with and for some people they spend more time with certain television families that they do with real people. Who are you spending most of your time with? Instagram influencers? The news? Tiger King? Netflix? YouTube creators?
Your media diet goes straight into your subconscious and directly affects your behaviour, your beliefs and very quickly your actions. Just as the food you consume affects your body the media and content you consume affects your mind.
Do you consume fast food media all day long? What is that doing to your brain? The odd media cupcake isn't going to cause too much damage but if you are consuming things that are bad for you all day long it is going to take it's toll on you very quickly.
It took several very painful arguments for us to notice the damage this shit did to us. And we only noticed it because we binged it. One episode a week wasn't going to affect us but spending our lives with these people???
Your media diet goes straight into your subconscious and directly affects your behaviour, your beliefs and very quickly your actions. Just as the food you consume affects your body the media and content you consume affects your mind.
Do you consume fast food media all day long? What is that doing to your brain? The odd media cupcake isn't going to cause too much damage but if you are consuming things that are bad for you all day long it is going to take it's toll on you very quickly.
It took several very painful arguments for us to notice the damage this shit did to us. And we only noticed it because we binged it. One episode a week wasn't going to affect us but spending our lives with these people???
Your training as a child
The third biggest source of influence and probably the hardest to shift comes from your past. What did your parents say to you when you were growing up about success and life? What did your teachers say to you growing up about success and life? What sayings do you repeat to yourself even today, that came from your childhood?
You aren't responsible for the programming that you were given as a child, however, you are 100% responsible for changing it as an adult. We are taught things as children, that we never evaluate as an adult. We just accept the beliefs and ideas that are given to us as truth.
I remember my mum repeating to me, when I was younger, "that money doesn't grow on trees." This was something that I repeated to myself well into my late 20s. I can understand why she believed it with the financial problems my Dad put the family through. Money wasn't growing on trees for them for many many years.
It wasn't until I was on one particular training course where they pointed out that money was made of paper. And it literally grew out of trees. That I started to change my mindset, if I went out and planted a orchard of apple trees. I could grow apples, collect them, harvest them, and then swap them for money. Money can grow on trees. This blew my mind because I started to realise that the beliefs we are handed as a child trap us.
We NEVER take the time to ask "as an adult is this belief helping or hindering me?". It is these beliefs and thoughts that trap us from ever trying new things when we're older. What did your parents, your teachers, and those people around you teach you when you were younger, but you still repeat to the people around you?
Katie and I run the Rebel Finance School together and every single year we take a belief exercise to find out what the strongest beliefs about money are amongst the group. Here are the top 6 beliefs:
Nearly 1000 people surveyed and these are the strongest beliefs? If this is what you believe then how are you ever going to make progress?
The beliefs that are handed down to you by other generations can mess you up and stop you from every making progress. If you believe that realistically you will never be wealthy how hard are you going to get there? If you then combine that belief with "If I strive for wealth and don't succeed then I will feel like a failure" you are in trouble!
We inherit beliefs, ideas and ways of acting from our parents and childhood and most of the time we accept them as absolute irrefutable fact and go through life without ever making up our own minds.
These beliefs, ideas and training from our childhood are the invisible chains that stop us from ever creating the future that we want to.
The third biggest source of influence and probably the hardest to shift comes from your past. What did your parents say to you when you were growing up about success and life? What did your teachers say to you growing up about success and life? What sayings do you repeat to yourself even today, that came from your childhood?
You aren't responsible for the programming that you were given as a child, however, you are 100% responsible for changing it as an adult. We are taught things as children, that we never evaluate as an adult. We just accept the beliefs and ideas that are given to us as truth.
I remember my mum repeating to me, when I was younger, "that money doesn't grow on trees." This was something that I repeated to myself well into my late 20s. I can understand why she believed it with the financial problems my Dad put the family through. Money wasn't growing on trees for them for many many years.
It wasn't until I was on one particular training course where they pointed out that money was made of paper. And it literally grew out of trees. That I started to change my mindset, if I went out and planted a orchard of apple trees. I could grow apples, collect them, harvest them, and then swap them for money. Money can grow on trees. This blew my mind because I started to realise that the beliefs we are handed as a child trap us.
We NEVER take the time to ask "as an adult is this belief helping or hindering me?". It is these beliefs and thoughts that trap us from ever trying new things when we're older. What did your parents, your teachers, and those people around you teach you when you were younger, but you still repeat to the people around you?
Katie and I run the Rebel Finance School together and every single year we take a belief exercise to find out what the strongest beliefs about money are amongst the group. Here are the top 6 beliefs:
- Money can't buy you happiness
- The rich get rich the poor get poorer
- It takes money to make money
- Realistically chance are I will never be wealthy
- If I strive for wealth and don't succeed then I will feel like a failure
- Getting rich takes too much work or struggle
Nearly 1000 people surveyed and these are the strongest beliefs? If this is what you believe then how are you ever going to make progress?
The beliefs that are handed down to you by other generations can mess you up and stop you from every making progress. If you believe that realistically you will never be wealthy how hard are you going to get there? If you then combine that belief with "If I strive for wealth and don't succeed then I will feel like a failure" you are in trouble!
We inherit beliefs, ideas and ways of acting from our parents and childhood and most of the time we accept them as absolute irrefutable fact and go through life without ever making up our own minds.
These beliefs, ideas and training from our childhood are the invisible chains that stop us from ever creating the future that we want to.
Societies beliefs exercise.
Over the next week, I would love you to start to write down these sayings and expressions and beliefs that you repeat to yourself and the people around you. If you have kids, what do you catch yourself saying to them that your parents said to you? What expressions or sayings have you picked up from the media or friends that you repeat?
You might be also thinking "Alan; not another week long exercise! COME ON. I am not going to do this home work". My response to this is:
Start to become conscious of the beliefs and sayings that you repeat to yourself and others around you.
The next step after this is to start to decide whether you want to proliferate those beliefs or break them. Society has told you so many different things and you have accepted a huge number of them without actually deciding whether or not they are right for you. One of the most pervasive beliefs in society is that the most important thing you can do is buy your own home and that renting is throwing away money.
Have you ever taken the time to do the maths to workout whether this is actually true or not?
This belief is actually a mathematical problem to workout whether or not renting and investing is better than buying. But no one actually takes the time to work it out. They just accept the belief that society has passed down without ever challenging it. Start to challenge societies beliefs and decide whether or not they are the right thing for you to live by.
We did the maths on this belief ourselves recently and it turns out there was little difference between renting and buying in Basingstoke over the years. So then it comes down to what do I actually want for my life rather than following just what society has taught me.
Over the next week, I would love you to start to write down these sayings and expressions and beliefs that you repeat to yourself and the people around you. If you have kids, what do you catch yourself saying to them that your parents said to you? What expressions or sayings have you picked up from the media or friends that you repeat?
You might be also thinking "Alan; not another week long exercise! COME ON. I am not going to do this home work". My response to this is:
- If you don't do the home work how do you expect anything to change?
- Can you do it for three days? Just keep a little note pad with you or write it in your phone for three days?
- If you can't manage three days then just sit down NOW and journal about it for 30 minutes. Can you give me 30 minutes for this exercise?
Start to become conscious of the beliefs and sayings that you repeat to yourself and others around you.
The next step after this is to start to decide whether you want to proliferate those beliefs or break them. Society has told you so many different things and you have accepted a huge number of them without actually deciding whether or not they are right for you. One of the most pervasive beliefs in society is that the most important thing you can do is buy your own home and that renting is throwing away money.
Have you ever taken the time to do the maths to workout whether this is actually true or not?
This belief is actually a mathematical problem to workout whether or not renting and investing is better than buying. But no one actually takes the time to work it out. They just accept the belief that society has passed down without ever challenging it. Start to challenge societies beliefs and decide whether or not they are the right thing for you to live by.
We did the maths on this belief ourselves recently and it turns out there was little difference between renting and buying in Basingstoke over the years. So then it comes down to what do I actually want for my life rather than following just what society has taught me.
Fitting in.....
We all have a need and desire to fit in. We want to feel like we are part of something bigger than ourselves, a community, a family or a group of friends.
When I was younger, this was my biggest driver. After being bullied heavily at school, all I wanted to do was to fit in and be part of the gang. To fit in growing up, I had to play soccer/football, drink and chase girls. That is what everyone else was interested in, and so if I wanted to be part of the gang, I had to be interested in it as well.
It's incredible how we change ourselves and our desires just to fit in with a group of people. It wasn't until I had done years and years of self development that I started to trust what I actually wanted in life and how I wanted to live. It was at this point that I started to stop caring about fitting in.
I started rebel Business School because the standard way to start a business that is taught around the world is completely wrong and actually damages people's financial future rather than helps them. I had to decide to stand out with my business to be able to achieve my mission of helping people. I didn't fit in with other start-up or traditional business support communities. I was teaching something completely different and had to decide to let go of fitting in to actually make progress. The standard way to start a business is to:
When I was younger, this was my biggest driver. After being bullied heavily at school, all I wanted to do was to fit in and be part of the gang. To fit in growing up, I had to play soccer/football, drink and chase girls. That is what everyone else was interested in, and so if I wanted to be part of the gang, I had to be interested in it as well.
It's incredible how we change ourselves and our desires just to fit in with a group of people. It wasn't until I had done years and years of self development that I started to trust what I actually wanted in life and how I wanted to live. It was at this point that I started to stop caring about fitting in.
I started rebel Business School because the standard way to start a business that is taught around the world is completely wrong and actually damages people's financial future rather than helps them. I had to decide to stand out with my business to be able to achieve my mission of helping people. I didn't fit in with other start-up or traditional business support communities. I was teaching something completely different and had to decide to let go of fitting in to actually make progress. The standard way to start a business is to:
- Come up with an idea.
- Write a business plan where you work out the total size of the market and what percentage of that market you are hoping to secure.
- Work out everything you need to buy to start your business. The amount of debt you need to get going
- Take a loan out for that amount of money, which is called a start-up loan.
- Go into debt and then spend all of the money you have borrowed on stock a website or business cards.
- After everything is ready, you go out to market and start to sell your product or service.
- Maybe you make money in year 2.
The standard way of starting a business is perpetuated by society. If you search in Google for how to start a business, the first article that comes up will talk to you about writing your business plan and where to borrow money.
If you go to traditional education, schools, colleges or universities, they will talk to you about writing business plans and borrowing money as the way to start a business. Society and everything around us trains us to start a business in this way. I realized that it is the most idiotic thing you can do.
There is an expression; "it takes money to make money" that society has trained us to believe. They have taught us that we need to get money before we can make money, which is the exact opposite of what is actually true. Banks and lenders want us to believe that we need to take a loan to start-up because that is how they make money! Is it any wonder that the biggest provider/sponsor of start-up support in the UK are banks?
Is it any wonder that we have never been able to get a bank to sponsor our course for how to start a business without borrowing money?
I built a global movement teaching thousands of people to start businesses without debt. If I had wanted to fit in, I would have just taught the same thing as everyone else. Sometimes the pressure to do the same as everyone else is so great that we just end up fitting in, even though deep within ourselves, we know it's not the right thing. It doesn't take money to make money. You don't need to write a business plan to build a business. You don't need to borrow money to be able to set up and sell. You can build a business without debt if you want to.
The pressure from society to follow the standard plan (business plans, debt etc.) is so immense that most people give in to it. If you Google the result and everything backs up that believe, if you go to the trusted start-up sources and they all say the same thing how hard is it to do the opposite?
You don't have to fit in. You can do things differently. And if you do things differently, you will get different results.
Life doesn't train us that well to stand out. It actually does the opposite. A school do you get rewarded for standing out and challenging the teachers and the assumptions? Do you parents like it when you challenge them? Does the judge in court like it when you tell him he is wrong? How do the professionals react when you question them?
Society and life train us to conform. This is why it is so hard to stand out and do things differently.
This chapter is designed to help you start to see the invisible chains that are wrapped around you and why it is so difficult for us to do things differently and stand out.
If you go to traditional education, schools, colleges or universities, they will talk to you about writing business plans and borrowing money as the way to start a business. Society and everything around us trains us to start a business in this way. I realized that it is the most idiotic thing you can do.
There is an expression; "it takes money to make money" that society has trained us to believe. They have taught us that we need to get money before we can make money, which is the exact opposite of what is actually true. Banks and lenders want us to believe that we need to take a loan to start-up because that is how they make money! Is it any wonder that the biggest provider/sponsor of start-up support in the UK are banks?
Is it any wonder that we have never been able to get a bank to sponsor our course for how to start a business without borrowing money?
I built a global movement teaching thousands of people to start businesses without debt. If I had wanted to fit in, I would have just taught the same thing as everyone else. Sometimes the pressure to do the same as everyone else is so great that we just end up fitting in, even though deep within ourselves, we know it's not the right thing. It doesn't take money to make money. You don't need to write a business plan to build a business. You don't need to borrow money to be able to set up and sell. You can build a business without debt if you want to.
The pressure from society to follow the standard plan (business plans, debt etc.) is so immense that most people give in to it. If you Google the result and everything backs up that believe, if you go to the trusted start-up sources and they all say the same thing how hard is it to do the opposite?
You don't have to fit in. You can do things differently. And if you do things differently, you will get different results.
- If you want the same results as everyone else, do the same as everyone else.
- If you want different results, do things differently.
- If you want exceptional results, do something exceptional.
Life doesn't train us that well to stand out. It actually does the opposite. A school do you get rewarded for standing out and challenging the teachers and the assumptions? Do you parents like it when you challenge them? Does the judge in court like it when you tell him he is wrong? How do the professionals react when you question them?
Society and life train us to conform. This is why it is so hard to stand out and do things differently.
This chapter is designed to help you start to see the invisible chains that are wrapped around you and why it is so difficult for us to do things differently and stand out.
The same results as everyone else
If you do the same thing as everyone else with your finances, you will get the same results as everyone else. The standard plan for people's finances is to get a good graduate job and start to earn more money. You then write your first property and spend everything you earn decorating and filling it with stuff. After you have filled that property. As you get promoted, you continue to spend all of the extra money you earn on upgrading your lifestyle. You buy a better car, you get a new. Dishwasher. You buy garden furniture. Eventually you start to earn so much money that you start to think about upgrading your house and moving from your starter home to a four bed home with land. You continue to spend everything you earn because you will always keep earning good money. 53% of Americans cannot survive a $400 emergency. The reason for this is that they spend every dollar and cent they earn each month. Society trains us to keep up with the Joneses and to keep buying the latest iPhone, the latest things and expensive meals and coffees. This is the standard plan for finances and will leave you broke at retirement. If you want different results, you have to do something completely differently. Despite the family pressure to upgrade our home and buy a house, Katie and I decided to stay in the two bedroom apartment we had already lived in. Instead of spending more money, we took every extra pound we earned and invested it instead. Poses here's those investments grew and grew until the point we never had to work again. I retired at 40 years old and Katie beat me by five years, retiring at 35. The reason we were able to retire 25 plus years earlier than the average person is because we did different things. If you want the same results as everyone else in society, then do the same things as everyone else. If you want different results, then do something completely differently. Stop being constrained by what society expects you to do and start deciding on what success looks like for you and working towards it. You can build any life you desire if you are willing to stand out from the crowd and do what it takes.
Standing up to the experts
Doctor story achillies
Judge story
Judge story
Disclaimer:
It appears that the Facebook comments aren't showing up for some people. I had a look into this and apparently Facebook blocks the comments section for people who aren't logged into Facebook on the current browser. This also means that if you are using a phone, you will need to be logged into Facebook on the browser, not just the app if you want to add a comment. Unfortunately, there doesn't seem to be a fix for this.
It appears that the Facebook comments aren't showing up for some people. I had a look into this and apparently Facebook blocks the comments section for people who aren't logged into Facebook on the current browser. This also means that if you are using a phone, you will need to be logged into Facebook on the browser, not just the app if you want to add a comment. Unfortunately, there doesn't seem to be a fix for this.
