• Home
  • Start Here
  • About
  • FIRE
    • Investing
  • Podcast
    • Podcast Season 1
    • Podcast Season 2
    • Coaching Series: Christina
    • Coaching Series: Jaymie
    • Coaching Series: Andrew
    • Coaching Series: Keith
    • Stats and Feedback
  • Rebel Finance School
    • RFS Financial Forecasting
    • Disclaimer
  • Blogs
  • Contact
    • FAQ
    • Press
  • The Extraordinary
    • Introduction
    • Chapter 1 Extraordinary
    • Chapter 2 We are where we are!
    • Chapter 3: If you want different results do different things
  • Debt Petition
  • Home
  • Start Here
  • About
  • FIRE
    • Investing
  • Podcast
    • Podcast Season 1
    • Podcast Season 2
    • Coaching Series: Christina
    • Coaching Series: Jaymie
    • Coaching Series: Andrew
    • Coaching Series: Keith
    • Stats and Feedback
  • Rebel Finance School
    • RFS Financial Forecasting
    • Disclaimer
  • Blogs
  • Contact
    • FAQ
    • Press
  • The Extraordinary
    • Introduction
    • Chapter 1 Extraordinary
    • Chapter 2 We are where we are!
    • Chapter 3: If you want different results do different things
  • Debt Petition
ALANDONEGAN.COM
  • Home
  • Start Here
  • About
  • FIRE
    • Investing
  • Podcast
    • Podcast Season 1
    • Podcast Season 2
    • Coaching Series: Christina
    • Coaching Series: Jaymie
    • Coaching Series: Andrew
    • Coaching Series: Keith
    • Stats and Feedback
  • Rebel Finance School
    • RFS Financial Forecasting
    • Disclaimer
  • Blogs
  • Contact
    • FAQ
    • Press
  • The Extraordinary
    • Introduction
    • Chapter 1 Extraordinary
    • Chapter 2 We are where we are!
    • Chapter 3: If you want different results do different things
  • Debt Petition

Blog

Welcome to Alan Donegan's blog.  Start reading for help investing, financial independence, life style design and many mini-experiments!
Picture

    Author

    Alan Donegan: Rebel Business School Co-Founder, Rebel Entrepreneur podcast host, Rebel Finance School co-founder and Queen's award winner.  Marvel movie fan fanatic, breakfast lover and financial independent traveller

    Picture

    Archives

    June 2022
    May 2022
    March 2022
    February 2022
    January 2022
    December 2021
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    August 2020
    July 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    August 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018

    Categories

    All
    Book Project
    Entrepreneurship
    FIRE
    Follow Your Dreams
    Fun
    Investing
    Project Hollywood
    Self Development
    Self-Development
    Seo-experiment

    RSS Feed

Back to Blog

My first time felt uncomfortable

23/2/2019

 
Just because something feels uncomfortable the first time you do it should you stop? 

We run an event at the PopUp Business School which is called walk like the president/first lady.   The basic message of the exercise is to change your body language to change the way you feel.  So we ask people to adopt confident body language and then walk round the room and meet other people.  The exercise creates some real energy in the room and gets people going!
Alan Donegan looking uncomfortable
Alan looking uncomfortable
Despite the buzz, energy and obvious impact there is always someone who comes to me after the exercise and says "that was great but it didn't feel natural"

Does it ever feel natural the first time?

I want to scream "You've been adopting and using nervous body language for twenty years!!!  Of course it is going to feel unnatural the first time!!!!!!"

It is not often that the first time you do something feels totally comfortable and natural.  It nearly always feels a bit weird to start with.  

Let me give you some examples:

  • The first time I did Yoga.  Did I feel comfortable and natural?  No I felt like a overweight bull trying to stand on one leg whilst keeping a calm face
  • Katie has just taken up the Guitar.  Do you think the hand positions and strumming felt natural the first time she picked it up?
  • I have started to write a screen play.  Do you think the fist time I opened up the software to write it felt natural and I was at ease using it?
  • There is another first time we could talk about as well but we won't go there.  Suffice to say it gets better with practice

Just because it doesn't natural the first time doesn't mean you should stop.  It means you need to keep going to practice until it becomes natural. 

Don't let the fact that something feels a little awkward or off stop you from pressing in and having a go!  It is bound to feel a little weird first time but if you stil at it then you will find it becomes natural and is just the way you are.

If you want to feel confident then stand and move confidently.  Of course it is going to feel weird if you haven't done it for a while.  That doesn't mean you should go back to being hunched over and shy for the rest of your life.  It just means you should push in and keep going. 

It is probably not going to feel comfortable the first time you do anything.  That is not an excuse to crawl back into your comfort zone. 

What do I really want to say?

Man-up, practice and keep going.  Do it twenty times and if it still doesn't feel comfortable then let's chat and work out how to make it comfortable.

  • The first time I did cold calling it wasn't comfortable.  In fact it bought me to tears but I worked out how to get past it and now I actually enjoy calling new people
  • I pressed on with Yoga and after 3 weeks solid I was starting to get somewhere and felt stronger, taller and healthier.  All my knee pain vanished and I felt amazing. 
  • I have got to press through the feeling of uncomfortableness writing movies at the start if I want to actually become a screen writer.  I have to keep going to make it through the unnatural, uncomfortable phase to the good stuff on the other side. 

Just because you didn't 100% enjoy it the first time doesn't mean you should never do it again.  

Here are my top 5 strategies for overcoming this initial uncomfortableness

  1. Know that it will pass as you get better at it.  Just knowing that this is likely to happen first time you try something can make you more comfortable getting through it
  2. Focus on the end goal.  Why are you doing this?  What is the big picture?  If you have a big enough WHY then you will get through a little bit of uncomfortableness
  3. Learn to spot it and love it.  Now you know about this phenomenon you can spot it, realise what is happening and know that if you are feeling this way it means you are probably making progress.  Next time you spot it jump up and shout "I AM ON THE RIGHT PATH!"  That will break the pattern and get you going!
  4. Do it with someone else.  It helps to have someone positive to do it with the first time.  Make sure it is someone positive though as if not they will drag you down and stop you both getting through it.  Find someone positive and support and decide to go together
  5. Commit to a period. Commit to a certain period to work through to see if you do really like it.  The pleasure normally comes as you get into it!  Commit to doing 10 Yoga sessions, commit to doing 100 cold calls with a friend, commit to doing a certain amount before making a decision. 

I hope this helps you to tackle your next project and get going.  Or if there is something you have tried before but not made it through then it inspires you to give it another go. 

Just get involved, commit and keep doing it.  It is never going to feel that comfortable the first time and that is just something you need to get used to. 

I would love to know if there is something you are committing to give a go knowing that you are going to have to go through the period of uncomfortableness?

Leave me a message below or sign up for my blog update in the form below.

Good luck and please use my energy and words as inspiration to make your own dreams come true!

​Alan
Comments
read more

Alan donegan

Home | About | Start Here | Podcast | FIRE | Contact | Podcast Season 1 | Podcast Season 2 | Stats & Feedback | Take Control of your Finances
Picture
Website Design by Developer Rocket
I built this website to share the life lessons I learn along the way, the cool stories, the adventures, the amazing people and everything I learn from all the stupid mistakes I make!  If you want to keep up to date then stick your email in below.  I promise to never share your email address or spam you!  Alan

SIGN UP FOR BLOG UPDATES AND TO FOLLOW ALAN ON HIS JOURNEY

Latest Blog's

Just start!  Get going! Investor Series

Vanguard Developed World versus Global index fund.  Investor Series​

The impact of fees on investments. Investor Series

* indicates required
Photos used under Creative Commons from Tone'o, bryan...